Parrots, eye patches, and bottles of rum were all the rage as Arona Carnaval 2018 set sail under a pirate themed flag. There was even a bit of shiver me timbers at the opening Cabalgata parade from Veronicas in Playa de Las Americas, as a cold wind off the sea tested the resolve of the more scantily clad revellers. The big plus was there was plenty of warm encouragement from the thousands packing the route to drive them on.

The Carnaval Queen candidates were among the suited and booted contestants but in their promotional pirate costumes, their election outfits would have to wait until their big nights. Just my luck the eventual Queen was the only one missing, for me it was pleasing to see British candidate Jade Newman brimming with pride. As always it was a melting pot of emotion, colour, nerves, and showmanship as the groups fell into line and slowly headed onto Avenida Rafael Puig for the music and dance shuffle along to the edge of Los Cristianos. Culture, tradition, and fun are the driving forces of Carnaval but it’s good for commerce too, there wasn’t an empty bar stool or restaurant table along the route.

The temporary showground ( well car park) with a giant ornate stage, was the focal point for the week ahead and anyone living close got a free dance music blast each night into the wee small hours. The Queens were duly elected, Inma Afonso Darias was chosen as the main Carnaval Queen, with Leonor Jimeno Herrera taking the infants top prize. I popped down to the final Saturday Day Carnaval, always a wild gathering of the younger revellers from noon to whenever. The chart groups and DJs were way over my aged head but the rythmn is always infectious and the fancy dress costumes were ingenious and funny – even if some of them were a bit confusing.

Sunday was the big day that everyone goes to even if they aren´t tempted by the many other distractions of the week. The Coso parade is like end of term, the judging has been done, the main shows played out, and time to go really wild and let rip. Of course it always starts late and by then the parade route from the shadow of Guaza mountain up to the cultural centre, was packed several layers deep, with many camped out for hours at road side bars, forcing themselves to drink. Teams of families and friends had worked months to stich up their loved ones in stunning costumes bursting with colour, and the dance moves and marching steps had become second nature.

There´s always a few strained faces and even a few tears from the younger, tired paraders but it was a grand team effort with hugs and words of encouragement close to hand. Interaction is always popular, whether it be a pose with a holiday maker that will make their photo memories special, or a normally sensible and staid older watcher being temporarily pulled into the action – especially if it involved one of the more risque outfits! The clever idea was to have a prop or a baggy costume where a little encouraging dink could be concealed, The incessant beat of the drum groups was a constant backing track to the stream of happy faces, and balconies and roof tops were packed by those seeking a crows nest view. It took the best part of two hours to complete the route but aching feet still had energy for another late, late dancing in front of the main stage.

Do sardines blush? If they do, the giant one awaiting it´s funeral was in for a shocking night. The last act of Carnaval was the funeral of the sardine, or to be strictly accurate, its cremation. The sweet, angelic fish was sat outside the Los Cristianos cultural centre as a curious crowd was joined by a selection of motley mourners. Many of the widows were surprisingly hairy and muscle bound “women” but their taste in wild clothes and aroused friends betrayed them as chaps having a great old time.

Carnaval is all about lent and a mood of revolution by the ordinary people against the oppressive church that imposed the ban on meat on the poor while they and their rich friends lived high on the hog. Sardines were often the only morsels that the poor in coastal areas could catch to supplement their meager diet, so the fish became a two fingered salute to the church. Rebel or not, it still had to endure some rough handling on its way through town and down the port road to the old beach to be set on fire. It was packed down there as the poor victim burst into flames boosted by a barrage of fireworks that lit up the sky.

So apart from another even longer night of dancing and drinking, Carnaval bowed out in a blaze of activity. It will return next year but for now it is the end.

It wasn´t quite the walk in the hills I had planned but with storm warnings for Tenerife, I took the easier option of a day in the capital, Santa Cruz. I had a few things on my tick list but the vibrant city always adds a few unexpected pleasures to the mix. First call had to be the Auditorium, a new metal sculpture had taken up residence just below the wave of the roof and having seen previous works by Julio Nieto, I was keen to see this one. The Search features a human figure hanging onto a Compass Rose, the rain was holding off and the gentle breeze was allowing the artwork to flutter just enough to show off the full glory of the new addition.

Crossing back to the entrance lobby of the main bus station I found another distraction. The public bus company Titsa, is celebrating 40 years of linking the busiest and more remote areas of Tenerife. I´m a big fan of their green chariots, they get me everywhere I need to be and are very cheap. Green wasn´t always the dominant colour of the fleet, a sleek red and white bus harked back to the early days and contrasted with a new hybrid gas and electric runaround, green in every way.

My main call of the day was the Museum of Nature & Man (museo la naturaleza y el hombre) half way between the bus station and the bustling port. Museums these days are not the formal stuffy places remembered from school trips, it´s all about interactive video screens, plenty of seating areas, and information in a range of languages. The jewell in the N & M crown has always been the display of mummified remains of the original Guanche inhabitants of Tenerife. They were waiting for me on the third floor but I had been drawn by a temporary exhibition, Athanatos, on and below the ground floor. I paid the residents rate of 4 euros for Athanatos and the freedom of the rest of the museum, the exhibition alone is 2 euros or free after 4 pm on Fridays and Saturdays and runs to 3^rd June.

A black pyramid in the centreof the ground floor plaza featured three gian screens exploring the nature of death and the attitude of different ages and cultures to this often taboo subject. It was just a gentle introduction to the eerie downstairs display area with rows of mummies and human remains from many eras and countries. The glass cases they occupied were glowing from white light tables, and the power leads plugged into the ceiling added to the feel of a mad scientists lair. I half expected a few of the guests to rise from their slabs and chase me back up the stairs. Suitably spooked, I worked my way back up to the main museum for a stroll around the three levels, there were a fair few people in, but considering the unattractive weather outside, it was less than I expected.

The ground floor dealt with the creation of the Canary Islands from its violent volcanic origins to the formation of land masses, mountains, and barrancos. Moving up, the natural sciences, that’s birds, bees, flowers, and trees, spilled forth through insect fossils, and on to models of sea creatures. School and college parties are the life blood of museums and I could see that study areas, activity packs, and more interactive screems would guarantee a visit became a pleasure and not a chore. The second floor was always my favourite, the wall of skulls told me I was on track and the amazingly well preserved Guanche mummies on their shelves were as fascinating as ever.

The mummies dated back to between 135 Bc and 1,420 BC, including a child found preserved in Adeje’s Barranco del Infierno. A couple of spare hands and feet added to the macabre but strangely alluring appeal of the old bones. The skin was so well preserved it semed almost like brittle papier mache. I was passing through on another whirlwind tour of Santa Cruz but have easily lingered all day in the museum, they have a cafe and restaurant, and wi fi served relaxation areas in the courtyards. The museum is open daily from 10am to 5 pm, they only close on the big christmas and new year days, and Carnaval Tuesday so go and have a browse. For me it was back out into the rain lashed streets of Santa Cruz. The weather doesn´t turn bad that often and it´s good to know that the capital has plenty of interesting places to visit, just up from the Museum of Nature & Man you will find TEA, an amazing modern art building and library, but more of that another time.

Tradition always draws me to Santa Cruz and La Laguna just before christmas to savour the grand designs of the belens (nativity scenes) and to ooh and aah at the festive lights. Apparently it took seven days to create the world, I suspect it took a lot longer to put together these variations on an annual theme.

First stop was the Caja Canarias bank HQ in Plaza del Patriotismo, Santa Cruz, they always have a large walk around display set on a big rural scale with a cast of hundreds of busy figures. This year it included a bit of a River Nile influence to compliment an Egyptian history exhibit in another hall. The clever thing about this show is the dimming and pulsing light in the room so you get that night time feel too. The meandering stream adds a living feel, and there´s always a few humourous characters if you peek inside of various courtyards. Opening times are Monday to Saturday10am to 1.30pm, and 5.30 to 8pm, Sundays are only on 24 and 31 December plus 5 January, from 10am to 1.30pm.

I don´t need much excuse to get the tram up to La Laguna, so I popped up to see their offering in the Casa del Capitanes, just around the corner from the tram terminus. Not only did they have a selection of model cattle and kings grazing in the outdoor plaza, but also a large room full of a long extended village christmas scene with grand buildings and those small touches that reflected their devotion. Flocks of sheep roamed, and small birds grouped together in flight above the roof tops. This one is open 10am to 2 pm and 4~pm to 7pm weekdays, and 11am to 2pm on Saturdays and Sundays. This is probably a good time to say that all the nativities are free, some have had charity collections in the past but that was not the case this year. I did like the knitted nativity in a shop window as well.

Back down to Santa Cruz and there was a strange mix going on at El Rinconito in Plaza Candelaria at the port end of the main shopping drag, Calle Castillo. The Bethlehem stable had a windmill attached to it, and a pink Milka chocolate cow grazed nearby. At least the Cabildo (Tenerife government) building looked more seasonal with it´s facade sending out a cheery greeting. Inside their belen featured rural life with all the christmas story trimmings and some impresive fishing boats. Opening times here are 9am to 3pm, 4pm to 9.30pm everyday, apart from morning only times on 24 and 31 December, and afternnon only on 25 December, 1 & 6 January.

Just one more call, the Canarian Parliament building in Calle Castillo. This is another elaborate walk around giant montage of rural scenes. The feeling is joyful, with big jolly characters, hard at work, and revelling in the joys of the festive season. You may well recognise landmarks of the seven islands that have been incorporated into the design. Ok here come those opening times, 10am to 3pm, and 4.30pm to 10pm, the exceptions are 24 December and 31 December 10am to 4pm, and 25 December and 1 January 4.30pm to 10pm. That should keep you out of the bars for a while, it nearly worked for me.

So there I am stood on Santa Cruz quay side looking at a space ship housing a Roman exhibition, after earlier visitng an Egyptian mummy show. At my side a Canarian ice crean van for a company called Califonia (why?) is relentlessly chiming the German song Lili Marlena (again why?). It´s no wonder my brain is confused.

It was all part of a very rewarding pre christmas visit to the Tenerife capital. Egipto En Busca De La Eternidad (Egypt in search of the eternity) was the latest in a long line of wonderful art exhibitions staged by the Caja Canarias Fundacion and housed at the two floor cultural space of the Caja Canarias bank HQ in Plaza del Patriotismo. Mournful mummies were what I expected and they were lurking but the first floor was more about the cultural life of ancient Egypt, featuring art, music, ceramics and a look at some of the leading dynasty´s. The faint waft of Egyptian music, secluded alcoves, and moody lighting helped to put me in the mood. It was a national holiday and I was glad to see many families enjoying the free exhibition.

Upstairs it all turned a bit more macabre, yep the mummies were revealing their secrets. British archaeologist Howard Carter uncovered the tomb of Tutankhamun, there were 65 revealing black and white photographs of the cursed expedition, a rare insight into the sheer scale of the endeavour. The boy king was just one of several sovereigns being shown in a new light. It wasn´t just wood, bronze, and ivory coffins on display, a cut away tomb showed the full inner workings of the last rites, and there was even a video alcove with more grainy and gruesome images. It´s well worth a visit before the works go back to Madrid´s Egypt Museum after 27 January 2018. It´s open Monday to Friday 10 am to 1.30pm, and 5.30 to 8pm. Saturday is just 10.30 to 1 .30pm, and even mummies get a day off on Sundays.

Honest I´m not after a free overdraft but the touring exhibition, Roma Norum Vita (Roman Life) is another free show from the Caja Canarias Fundacion. The space ship like touring venue turned out to be more of a Tardis, it had a Roman city and 2,000 years of excellence packed inside. A scene setting video room gave way to a paved and very solid feeling street lined with forum steps. Rooms feeding off showed their home comforts like the communal toilets, tapped drinking water, and lavish sleeping quarters. A backdrop became another video wall showing more of their political, social, and commercial life. I almost felt like a ghostly intruder, or an extra in Up Pompei. The show lasted about 25 minutes and a lot of families brought young children who looked genuinely fascinated.

To catch a glimpse of this glorious past, head for the ferry port, Monday to Friday it´s open 12.30 to 2pm, and 5 to 9pm, Saturdays, Sundays, and holidays it´s 11 to 2pm, and 5 to 9pm. They take 25 people at a time, and can do groups if you pre call 902906666, and these Romans remain until 25 January 2018.

They´re fresh, they´re fruity, they´re delicious, and they´re locally produced in the Tenerife municipality of Arona. It was high time for a farmers market within easy reach of the tourist hot spots of the south and on Saturday 14 October 2017 the doors opened on the Mercado del Agricultor in Valle San Lorenzo.

With a high vaulted roof and plenty of glass I anticipated being boiled and poached inside the new building in Calle Cooperativa near the big Cepsa petrol station, but it was large, bright, roomy, and surprisingly cool despite the outside calima already hitting 31 degrees at 10 am. The market opens on Saturdays and Sundays from 8 am to 2 pm but the official launch we was geared to a 10 am ceremonial opening by the Alcalde (mayor) of Arona, Jose Julian Mena Perez. This fitted in nicely with free coaches from Playa de Las Americas and Los Cristianos, provided by the Arona Ayuntamiento (council) who have financed the market. Look out for those red coaches, they will continue to be free each Saturday and Sunday, 10 am from Las Americas, 10.15 from Los Cristianos, and 10.20 from Chayofa, with a 1 pm return calling at those three points.

Four wide aisles were lined with 60 stalls, nearly all in use, selling fruit, vegetables, pastries, and wine, many of them with the highest of eco friendly pedigrees. There were piles of potatoes, crowds of carrots, a plentitude of peppers, and cakes that would test anyones resolve to wait until tea time. Some of the more specialist items included, jams, teas, coffees, and breads. A show cooking display featured soup made from calabazo (a kind of gourd) and white cheese, a stage allowed for some live traditional Canarian music and dance, and there was even a childrens play room near the entrance.

As the seasons change there will be new wonders to behold, stocking for the festive season meals will be a lot easier and seasonal specials like chestnuts will feel cosy in their new surroundings. I arrived on the free bus but there are two regular Titsa public bus routes that pass through Valle San Lorenzo at the weekends, with stops a short hop from the market. I got a 418 Titsa bus destined for Playa de Las Americas bus station and bailed out in Los Cristianos, just 30 minutes and 1.15 euros with an advance Bono bus ticket.Go on, take a visit and you will realise how green is your Valle.

Any excuse for a party, that´s the Tenerife way, so why not throw a huge annual bash in the streets of the capital city, Santa Cruz, all inspired by the full moon. The Plenilunio had reached it´s 7^th year and true to form it wasn´t hanging around waiting for the silvery moon, That´s why just after noon I was confronted by a large group of mature men dressed as exotic female singers, complete with large phallic microphones.

That was at the African Market, a short walk from the bus station where my Titsa bus had delivered me from Los Cristianos. Stalls and costumes were taking shape in every side street, there were 27 stages and focal points for activities as well as mobile displays. In Calle Castillo, the main shopping street, the 101 Brass Band were strutting their stuff, diving in and out of shops, and updating recent pop hits. The weekly El Clavel market was squeezed in to a tight side street with its mix of retro fashion and musical memorabilia. Calle del Castillo is also home to the Circulo de Bellas Artes and I was keen to see the caped crusaders promoting a comic exhibition.

Vintage cars pop up at events all over Tenerife, their setting was particularly good this time, between the Cabildo (government) building and the Plaza de España with its monuments and lake. An Abingdon (near Oxford) built MG would have been tempting enough but add a delightful lady in an American GI uniform and I was purring. The port seemed a natural next call, especially as it was hosting the Cross Fast Civico Militar event, think along the lines of the poppy appeal Royal Tournament in London. The assault course looked hard work to me even without the rifle carrying but they all made it look like a stroll.

I always have a look to see what boats are in port, there were a couple of big cruise liners but I was more intrigued by several large, flash looking motor yachts. The blue bottomed Excellence V charter yacht was good, the brand new silent cruising 49 metre long Home was even better, but pride of place went to the 66 metre long Vanish, complete with helicopter. It cost a cool 125 million dollars but the owner, American Larry Van Tuyl has an estimated worth of 3.5 billion dollars. If your reading this Larry, you really need to own a football club, CD Tenerife would fit the bill nicely.

Anyway back in the real world, there was loads more to see, Parque Garcia Sanabria was full of food trucks offering Dorada, mojitos, and exotic variations on burgers. Back up at Plaza Weyler I could see the Canary Islands military commend palace was fronted by old style soldiers rather than their current counterparts, their uniforms were familiar to me from the recreations of Nelsons failed invasion. It was one of many buildings throwing open its doors so I had a look in, only the courtyard was accessible but it gave a brief insight into local military history.

Plaza del Principe was one of the hot spots for live music and dance so I had a quick look at that, and despite having had a large dinner, I still found a home for the free chocolate donuts being given out around town. The celebrations were going to last long into the night and of couse the full moon would add to the atmosphere but my time was ticking away as I worked my way towards the Heliodoro Stadium for CD Tenerife v Nastic. I wanted to catch up on the Casa del Carnaval but the nearest I got was a birds eye view from the bridge just before the Armada Sur´s pre match bar. For the record, CD Tenerife won 2-0 and I did get a glimpse of a brilliant and vibrant moon over the port as our coach sped back towards the south.

Chunky white candles nestled against the old stone houses down all the streets in Arona town, quite a task putting all 10,000 of them in place, and a big box of matches would be needed to light them all up when darkness approached. There was a much more basic feel to this years Dia de Los Tradiciones (Day of Traditions) but those little touches helped to evoke the history of the people and their crafts just 10 kms up from Los Cristianos.

I arrived on a TITSA public service bus after waiting an hour for the free shuttle to show but I wasn´t complaining at a 20 minute journey and a mere 1.25 euros on my bono ticket. Music wafted through the air as I browsed the stalls in the tight street on the way to the church plaza. Those small touches included a free event and guide map that was tinted brown to look old and worn, it had to be big as there were so many events crammed in. On my stroll I saw the source of the music, a traditional Canarian group with dancers and musicians.

One side street featured old home made toys, wooden karts looked certain to give a bumpy but fun ride over the cobbles. Eco power is nothing new, good old pedal power was propelling a kiddies roundabout with some very basic horses, sand filled egg timers measured out the duration of a euros worth of spinning, and boxes of bananas packed a little nourishing after ride treat. Up at the plaza by the church of San Antonio Abad, a stage was set for full orchestras of music later in the day. Heading into Calle El Calvario I found more stalls, some lovely smells were coming from La Cocina de la Abuela (Grandmas Kitchen), they were teaching children some basic recipes and also offering free plates full of potatoes, meat, and gofio – well I couldn´t say no.

Another aspect of this special day is to open up old buildings like the Casa la Bodega, the scene for some of the theatrical performances during the day. I caught up with a display of Salto de Pastor (shepherds leap) an old way of vaulting across small ravines with the help of a large wooden pole. The Casino de Arona was also open to the public and featured antique radios and record players, some of them took me back to my parents radiogram, well at least we didn´t walk down the street in a trance listening to them.

There are several big collections of classic cars in Tenerife and a dozen of the famous old models were on show outside the casino, a magnet for poses against the gleaming bodywork and for smaller enthusiasts a chance to ride the running boards. I spent a good few hours taking in the goodies on offer, it was nice to see old historic houses identified with brief histories of famous families that lived in them, and also places of work and food production like the old gofio mill house. Never let it be said that Arona is just dwelling in the past, one week on (6^th & 7^th October) from the Day Of Traditions, the church plaza would be throbbing to the sound of car engines ready to embark on the Subida de Arona – La Escalona rally.

Music, colour, madness, and costumes explode into life all over Santa Cruz every February and March but even during the rest of the year it permeates the city as costumes are made, routines rehearsed, and stages constructed. Bottling that excitement into a yea round visitors centre and museum has proved elusive in the past so a month after its opening, I eagerky visited the Casa Del Carnaval or Carnaval House in Barranco del Santos inalnd at Tenerife’s capital city.

It’s not an easy setting for the 3 million euro purpose built centre as it lies below and between two of the largest bridges over the dry ravine that can decome a raging river in winters big downpours. Plenty of signs posted the way from the shopping and port area but I approached from the bus station direction to the Puente Serrador bridge and took the many stone stairs down. Higher up the barranco the drop from the towering Puente Galceran involves more steps, or a long rambling ramp, car access is possible but a bit of a labyrinth through back streets. Maybe a shuttle bus calling around the city would be a good future idea or get the open top tour bus to include the centre on its route.

The frontage looks bright, cheery, and modern, and the staff are very friendly and welcoming but on my late July visit it wasn’t all finished. I soon learned that it wont go full blown until September 2017. Until then it is free, a yet to be agreed low feel from September is expected to be a maximum of two euros. Undaunted I walked through the entrance hall lined with old Carnaval posters and large interactive displays. Pride of place went to the winning costume of the 2017 Carnaval Queen. I was pleased to see a few other visitors on this Saturday afternoon, I later read they had 4,000 visitors in the first month.

Heading into the biggest hall I was impressed by the huge circular, glass, back lit, display case, it gave a great feel of the splendour and sheer scale of Carnaval. There was a central bank of interactive stations with large video displays on various aspects of Carnaval, and earphones for a commentary in Spanish or English. It was very informative but the English option wasn’t working – ready in September. Further along were sets of virtual reality goggles to immerse yourself in the swirl of Carnaval, again only Spanish until September. Cruise ship visitors have been mentioned as one target audience so the English, and maybe German would be a big boost. At ehe nd of the hall was a mock up theatre stage, seating area, and racks of costumes for children to enjoy the dressing up frenzy. That´s another winning idea as school groups are high on the target audience list too, passing on Carnaval tradition to the next generation is a proud tradition.

Another exhibition hall featured costumes and history of the various groups like comparsas and murgas.There were also a lot of old newspaper front pages showing coverage on Carnaval through the years. Back in the entrance hall I popped into the cafe bar but that was just an empty shell with a few seats, it leads out onto a spacious outside terrace and will be a nice area to realx and discuss the exhibitions – hopefully from September. The cafe bar must be the key ingredient to making the museum at least partially self supporting. A second floor houses archives and a study area – again very commendable, I hope it all comes together, Santa Cruz needs and deserves a home for Carnaval history. A few years ago there was a permanent exhibition of Carnaval costum es in the Parque Bulevar shopping centre but it only lasted just over a year.

On my way out I did enjoy gazing upward at the magnificent structure of the Puente Galceran bridge. Tha t has stood the test of time and I hope the Casa Del Carnaval can do the same. I will definately be back to see the complete picture later in the year. In the meantime it is open daily from 9am to 7.30 pm.

Imagine a painting so enchanting and emotional it took your breath away, then imagine it housed in a gallery so stylish and beautiful it almost outshone the contents. That was the sort of Easter Thursday I found in Guia de Isora for the first of the four day Pascua Florida street exhibition of floral sculptures.

My last visit to the event, unique in Spain, was on a cloudy day but this year the sun blazed and the views out over Playa San Juan to the crystal clear island of La Gomera were as good as I have ever seen them. Taking the modern concrete ramp off the main road, a series of large straw cubes ringed with flowers eased me into onto the church surrounds. “Dice” was the name of this work, referring to the casting of lots as people waited for Jesus to die on the cross. Just beyond was the church plaza and a stunning piece “From The Sixth Hour” with an Agave plant representing nails through the lords hands as roses bloomed below. It was at that point the church bells peeled gently, I wasn’t the only one to stop and savour the moment.

I must make it clear that I am the least religious person I know but I can still appreciate beauty, sincere sentiment, and well crafted art. Guia de Isora is cracking little town bursting with character and for the Pascua Florida the narrow backstreets are closed to what little traffic there is, allowing a gentle stroll around the 18 works, each with a brief description in several languages. But wherever you go, the recently refurbished church of our lady of the light draws you back to its large, partly shaded plaza – the crown of thorns made a nice centre piece.  You might think I was laying it on a bit thick if I said the birds were chirping sweetly as well – but they were.

Anyway it was time to explore the back streets to tick off all the works, not in strict number order, the map on each description was a rough guide to how the streets linked up. Back To Life in a long side alley may have looked like multi coloured wizards hats but it referred to the disciples waiting for the resurection. Passing along Calle La Vera it was nice to see the red crosses on the cultural centre, these are a regular feature but not one of the 18 main works. Next up was one good enough to eat. People were still working on a wall mounted work featuring fresh bread rolls weaved into the circular design. Some of the settings are cleverly tucked away, such as Sermon In The Garden, trailing up a narrow stone walkway. At this point several works could be viewed at once and also a tempting glimpse of the church, a couple of artists were sketching what they saw, very impressively, I was hopeless at art in school.

I took a few detours and back tracked to see a few favourite creations, it was good to see so many people enjoying the day. Forced to choose, i´d have plumped for “Unconditional Love”  simply because the heart design looked so wonderful with the majestic church in the background. Many gathered around the church plaza, a shadey cafeteria was doing a brisk trade and a small wind instrument orchestra struck up with some live classical offerings. On the following evening there would be live theatre in the streets but I grabbed a snack further down the road and waited at the bus station for my green chariot back to Los Cristianos.

Quiet moments are few and far between during Carnaval season but in Los Cristianos Sunday morning was, if you’ll pardon me singing, Easy Like A Sunday Morning. It was a time to wallow in hangovers while taking a little air at the showground to catch the classic car show, and dog show that co existed nicely in the morning sunshine.

BMWs and Mercedes Benz jostled for attention but I was looking for motors that spoke to me, a VW camper van complete with a cross dressing hippie practically yelled at me. As an Oxford boy, a mini winked cheekily at me and a MG sports car purred gently as people worshipped every last nut and bolt. By now the dogs were getting preened, dressed, and ready for their big moment, they all seemed quite happy to be squeezed into all sorts of fancy dress get ups. Apart from the odd playful bark, they were fairly subdued, not even the prescence of a giant koala bear with yellow and purple balloons phased them. Some of the owners had cleverly inserted references to the Arona Carnaval theme of Las Vegas. A dog with a roulette wheel on his back brought a new meaning to mobile betting, and his owner looked very impressive decked out with a pack of cards skirt and a sign advising people to make their bets.

The main event for Sunday afternoon was the Coso parade, here´s a few of the groups that adorned the streets for a couple of hours, most of my shots are in a big spread in this weeks Canarian Weekly. The parade was advertised to start at 4pm but in true Tenerife fashion was almost an hour late, my attention was distracted not only by some of the skimpier outfits, but also the Cadiz v CD Tenerife game that was being relayed through my earhole. I always enjoy a mooch round while the participants are getting ready for the off, it´s nice to see the attention to detail, the excitement, and a little nervous tension. All the best floats and costumes include somewhere to stash plenty of liquid encouragement, for the first time in my memory there was no blazing sun for the procession, but the liquid was pre arranged so it would have been rude not to enjoy it.

After a hectic week, Monday night brought the sardine funeral, it gets ruder each year with men dressed as wailing widows following the giant sardine, exposing their fancy undergarments below the black outfits, and waving the odd exagerated manhood. It´s always great fun as the procession makes its slow progress around the streets and down to the beach. Past events have taught me that after a flurry of early photos I ca adjourn to The Devon Arms for a couple of pints of Dorada and still beat the sardine and friends to the sealed off enclosure near the shore. This years fish was a good burner, it took just the right amount of time to scorch off the multi coloured scales and cute make up job, and the fireworks put on a show worthy of New Years Eve.