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It’s another holiday weekend coming up, Thursday is a national fiesta, Day of the Constitution, and Friday will be taken by most people as a puente (bridge) day, as it is hardly worth going in for that one odd day. If your looking for something different to do, get along to the Magma art and congress centre by the Las Americas bus station for the Living and Lifestyle trade show.
These shows always make big claims as basically they are there to sell to you but at just 3 euros entrance, it’s worth a punt, if only to have a nosey inside “the bunker”, as the bleak stone building has become known. We are promised furniture, cars, fashion, a childrens park, beauty, sport and much more from Noon until 10pm on December 6 to 9.
SaturdayDecember 8 is billed as the big day with lots of all singing all dancing displays including at 7.30pm the election of Mr and Miss Magma -ooh err. It’s not exactly hard to get to as most buses call in at the bus station next door and it’s only a short walk through to the seafront. It’s worth checking out the almost finished pedestrianised promenade by the beach, it’s taken ages but it is a big improvement.
After a couple of jittery weeks, the good news is that it’s all systems go for the Elton John concert at Golf Costa Adeje on January 24. Tickets are now on sale and the official Elton John website is now showing the correct venue rather than the short lived choice of the Olympic Stadium, Arona.
Just a reminder, the show begins at 9pm and tickets are 35 euros to stand or 90€ and 120€ for the seats. The Elton John website has started to sell tickets to Rocket Club members and the general public will soon follow. If you are in Tenerife, they can also be bought from El Corte Ingles department store in Santa Cruz, Repsol garages and Caja Canarias cash machines, and of course there is the phoneline 902056492.  Otherwise try www.generaltickets.com or there is a new website from the concert organisers www.eltonjohntenerife.com Fingers crossed, it should be just the thing that Tenerife needs to restore some confidence in staging big events.
I see that Keane have a new live concert DVD out for christmas, apparently with the Tenerife version, when you open the box it’s empty!
Bah humbug, it’s that time of year again, well it seems to have been for ages, even here in Tenerife, the street decorations went up in October, so much for mañana. Yes the shops here are brimming with awful decorations and the cheap Todo shops have those horrible singing Santa’s outside.
 One Spanish tradition that always makes me laugh like a drain is El Caganer, the shitter on the nativity scene. This is a Catalan tradition which has some genuine meaning to do with regeneration of the soil but is also good fun. It started with a shepherd on the scene around the stable, squatting down to make a deposit, but now there are loads of Celebrity Caganers you can buy including royalty and politicians.
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Thierry Henry, now plying his trade for Barcelona, is the latest addition and costs 14 euros from www.caganer.com all you have to do is log on, as they say.  Christmas hasn’t really arrived though for me until the 3 Kings start to appear on the Dorada beer bottle labels. Aah isn’t tradition wonderful.
If, like me, your idea of taming the Atlantic consists of downing several bottles of beer on the Fred OIsen ferry, the thought of rowing 2,900 miles from Tenerife to Antigua in something resembling a floating coffin, will fill you with dread. So it is with great admiration I am getting involved in the rowing season in a purely, lazy git stood on the side with notebook and camera sort of way.
Peter Raab and Tim Wilks will set off from Puerto Colon on Saturday Decmber 8 in their attempt to defy nature. I have been following their build up and you can read all about it in the islands top newspaper, The Tenerife Sun look for features, free from 300 outlets around the island, or there’s more in the form of my blogs for Freebird. And talking of Freebird, they are one of the sponsors for Peter and Tim’s crossing as the duo aim to raise money for Los Cristianos based charity Orobal who bring comfort and quality of life to mentally and physically handicapped youngsters. There will be a big charity day on Sunday November 25 starting with a 2 hour catamarran sailing with food and drink from Puerto Colon followed by a BBQ at Monkey Beach Club, Las Americas. Tickets are just €25 for adults and €10 for children, first child goes free. Call Freephone 900714189 or book online at www.freebirdsailing.com
It looks like Elton John is heading for Tenerife after all with a January 24 concert at the Costa Adeje golf course, but of course things never run to plan here. The original announcement had the concert set for the Olympic football stadium in Las Americas and that was confirmed on the Elton John official website. Within hours though the venue was changed to the Costa Adeje golf course due to work being done on the football stadium in January, didn’t they know this at the time of booking?
Anyway lets hope and assume that Elton’s people are aware of the change and have agreed to it. There is a special phoneline to call to pre order, BUT not buy tickets as yet, call 902056492. Prices are 35 euros for the basic seats, 90 euros for better ones and 120 euros for the V.I.P front row. The venue will be selling 25,000 tickets.
It’s all more embarrasment for Santa Cruz council after deputy mayor, Angel Llanos, announced months ago at a press conference with the promotors, that Elton would play the dockside in Santa Cruz on November 17. This was never confirmed by Elton John’s people who eventually had to issue a denial of any such concert. Despite this Angel Llanos has sinced announced his intention to have Elton perform at the Recinto Ferial in Santa Cruz in March. The new move has pulled the rug (sorry Elton, no pun intended) from under his feet.
Let’s hope it is all plain sailing from here as we can’t afford another musical cock up on the island.
Many of you may have noticed a big clamp down going on across Tenerife over the last month to 6 weeks. The police are out every night with the Gruas, moving cars from the daft places they have always obstructed. Bar and restaurant PR’s have been pushed back onto their property , new standardised umbrellas and awnings have been imposed on bars, Unelco have flexed their muscles, taken out their power junction boxes and closed bars and now illegally moored boats have been turfed out of Los Cristianos harbour, although some have only moved a short way and stand off Las Vistas beach.
As a cynical old git who doesn’t believe in coincidence, may I point out that this has all happened since the government have started to issue realistic tourism figures that show the mess Tenerife and the other Canary Islands are in. It seems the word has been passed down from on high to tighten up on all those small infringements of the law that have been overlooked for years.
You can expect another stamp of authority at the end of this month when hundreds of ABTA (Association of British Travel Agents) reps arrive on Tenerife for their annual conference. The British market has been falling more than any other, September figures show an 11 % drop in Brits on the previous year and this week more stats show the Canary Islands have lost One Million foreign tourists between 2001 and 2006.
Just a little insight into how the tourism department works. This Monday, both airports were due to start handing out little boxes of 3 bananas to all tourists coming in, complete with useful tourist information. Some news sources even said the promotion had been running already for a few weeks. I went to Reina Sofia on Monday to get a nice pic for Think Spain Today and yes, they had no bananas. I was told the promotion is now not starting until today, Thursday, we shall see. I’m sure those tourists wont miss their free bananas but it was a nice idea and at least showed some imagination but as always it was poorly carried out.
Who says that the Tenerife government is not reaching anyone with it’s tourism drive? U.F.O’s have been spotted over La Laguna, it happened on September 9 but has only just been reported in the Canadian magazine, U.F.O Digest.
An American couple, Kalani and Katiuska Hanohano, who live in La Laguna, reported a four hour close encounter that started at 1.40pm on a clear calm day. Kalani says “I saw to the east of me a silver object floating over the freeway that links La Laguna to Santa Cruz, it looked like a blanket of some sort, twisting and folding into itself.”
There was more to come “I observed a very bright oblong shaped light arriving from the south east. It intercepted the “blanket” and continued to head north west towards La Laguna.” At this point, Kalani said he got the video recorder from the house but the article only showed a crude mock up picture with an object above a Tenerife beach.
And the climax “My attention was focused on the clear sky over the mountains, I saw a rectangular portion of the sky, like a rectangular window, and the area inside rippled and was distinct from the area surrounding it.”
I don’t want to be cynical, im no stranger to the Klingons – Dorada and curry does it every time. Apparently the aliens were prepared to stay but a man offered them a scratch card and said “Hello, friendly martians?” It’s a shame that none of the Canarian papers picked up on this at the time, surely someone else must have seen it?
 
We do get some good concerts here in Tenerife, despite the odd admin error and no show. The latest star to grace our island is Andrea Corr, the delicious lead singer from Irish family group, The Corrs. Andrea will be at the Recinto Ferial in Santa Cruz on Saturday November 10 as just one of 9 acts for a mere 10 euros.
This is the second annual Tenerife 40 Pop concert and features mainly Canarian bands such as Nek and Motel, playing to a 13,000 crowd. Tickets are on sale at Corte Ingles or through the website of promotors LM Producciones, or try your local record shop.
Andrea Corr has just launched her first solo LP, called Ten Feet High, and her strong distinctive voice is a wonderful as ever. It could be one of the concerts of the year.
 So you like cars eh and fancy yourself as a bit of a Jeremy Clarkson, except not as pompous, well get along to the big motor show in Santa Cruz from October 23 to 28 at the Recinto Ferial, see pic. 
There is 19,000 square metres of display space featuring 66 exhibitors of cars and accesories. The show is open from 11am to 9pm and is just 5 euros to get in. If you want the full low down, check out the website for the 5th Salon de Automovil de Canarias.
Are you feeling energetic? Wanna do some high speed sight seeing? Then the Santa Cruz Half Marathon is for you.
It takes place on Sunday November 4 with a 9am start from the Recinto Ferial, opposite the hook nosed audotorium. It will cost you 12 euros to take part but you have to sign up by the end of October. Most council sports centres will enrol you but check the website above for more info.